You Are Getting Fat!
This week, I have been in very much of a “call ‘em as I sees ‘em” mode. An incredibly large number of things are rubbing me entirely the wrong way these days and I am feeling particularly disinclined to be nice and cuturally sensitive to people. This issue of being nice and putting up with rude and unnecessary comments here in Korea and the possible reasons for the rude and unnecessary comments came up in an MSN chat coversation with an American woman who has to deal with boorish behavior on a regular basis. I was going to write something about this, but I decided that the chat transcript spoke for itself. So, here it is:
Anon: hmmm….i just got called fat again
Anon: first time this week
Jeff: wow… what took so long?
Anon: i dunno! ??
Anon: i decided i don’t like it when people say that
Anon: but i’m not sure what i’m going to do about it
Jeff: Now, why wouldn’t you like that?
Jeff: Me, in my never to be culturally correct, capitalist, imperialist aggressor insensitivity, i usually make some equally offensive comment about them.
Jeff: “you’re fat too” “Oh, you are looking bald” “is that a zit?”
Anon: do you seriously or are you just saying that? not my shiljangnim but another shiljangnim just told me this.
Jeff: i do that.. it usually pisses them off…..go figure…
Anon: we walks by my desk and says, “i think you’re gaining weight.” and then leaves.
Anon: wth?
Jeff: and they really can’t figure out why you are being so mean to them….
Anon: really? ok then i guess i’ll try it
Jeff: it might get you fired….
Anon: oh then i guess i won’t.
Jeff: well.. who knows how they will react… you should try saying something a little less offensive.
Anon: but i don’t see how they can say that. my clothes still fit.
Anon: if i have gained weight i don’t see how it could have been that much
Jeff: you haven’t
Anon: my thighs don’t rub together
Anon: nothing is tight on me…things seem to fit the same as they always have
Anon: ???
Jeff: You look just as thin and lovely as ever.
Anon: i mean, i think i would know if i had gained weight. i gained a lot in [another country] and i knew i had at the time, but i wouldn’t say i have here
Anon: ???
Jeff: not that I have seen.. i was going to mention last time that you look like you actually lost some.
Anon: nice try jeff…in all honesty, i may have gained some weight BUT i KNOW i haven’t gained THAT much…but i do wonder why the sudden stream of comments these
days…
Jeff: no i’m serious.
Anon: me too
Anon: i’m serious too
Jeff: i was going to say that.
Anon: anyway i don’t get it. they just randomly come up and say it to me in front of everyone
Jeff: you should watch and see if it only happens when you wear certain clothes.
Jeff: because they are idiot, ass-clown Korean men.
Anon: yeah i don’t get them
Anon: do they say this to others who obviously are fat?
Jeff: yes.
Jeff oh oh oh oh yes.
Anon: i’m next to one chubby girl and across from another and they are obviously fat
Jeff: I hear that crap at least 2 or 3 times a day.
Anon: are you serious? it just goes around your office? i don’t get it! i really don’t!
Jeff: not around the office….they know better now….i’m talking about total strangers on the street or cashiers or waiters or gas station attendants.
Anon: are you serious?
Anon: but
Anon: WHY?
Jeff: because…….
Jeff: just… Because.
Jeff: we are not human. we couldn’t possibly have the same feelings and sensitivities as real people.
Anon: my friend was constantly told by her homestay that she was fat and she wasn’t!!!!
Anon: and then they wonder here in korea why she left
Jeff: Just think of everything like that that you say to a dog or a monkey and ask yourself why you say those things to a dumb animal…..then you will have your answer
as to why the koreans say that to you.
Anon: haha
Jeff: (is that way to cynical and nasty of me?)
Anon: no it sounds like the truth
Anon: anyway thanks for letting me vent. i’m over it already. until next time that is…
Jeff: Can I post the transcript on my blog?
Anon: if you wish
Jeff: OK