Next to a loved one’s death, divorce might be the most painful human experience. It’s painful because divorce represents a failure in the most intimate human relationship. It involves the alienation and loss of another person we loved, and lost.
In this most painful human journey, a divorce support group can be life-saving, and life-changing.
I am a divorce survivor. For me, divorce represented the lowest point of my life. I found out, though, that the low-point of divorce opened up a new life for me. That new life was far healthier, far happier and whole, than my previous married life, ever.
Good marriages don’t end in divorce. Only troubled, dysfunctional ones do. Therefore, the journey through divorce should be all about reclamation: reclaiming our lives, reclaiming our beings, reclaiming our identity, reclaiming our joy.
While our society still regards divorce as a scandal, divorcees do not wear the scarlet letters they once, sadly, were forced to carry. Most people accept the fact that statistics show half the marriages in America end in divorce.
In some marriages, people find themselves in abusive relationships. In some marriages, people find themselves controlled and manipulated. In some marriages, people find themselves slowly losing themselves.
In those marriages, divorce may be the only humane option. In some instances, divorce provides the only avenue of survival.
Friends and other family members can have sympathy. Only someone who has gone through divorce herself or himself can feel empathy. Only someone who has walked through the humiliation and disorientation can attest to the light and wholeness waiting on the other side.
I had to experience my own journey through divorce. I learned so much about myself, and about life, in general. My support group helped save me. They saw me through to the other side.